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Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Bad Influence


I think I am a bad influence on my children. Others are starting to notice too. Complete strangers give us looks of disdain, acting as if we should be embarrassed and shamed. Sometimes when Bird and Deal are with me they start writhing about in wild ways, blabbering uncontrollably, flailing about like octopuses on speed. They jump and scream like David Archuleta-crazed school girls at times. This is exponentially amplified when maracas and other such instruments make their way into the scene.

All because of KC and the Sunshine Band.

They can totally tell the difference between Boogie Shoes, Shake Your Booty, and That's the Way I Like It. Bird thinks he is my own personal Boogie Man. Deal's all about gettin' down tonight. They both know all the words to Give it Up. Granted, there are only four words that keep repeating in that song. Come on now, sing it with me. I know you are in your head right now.

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na,
Baby give it up
Give it up, Baby give it up

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na,
Baby give it up
Give it up, Baby give it up

Man, that's gonna be an ear worm.

I have held my boys' innocent little hands and personally escorted them over the deep end. I can only imagine the shame Bird will feel in music class when he starts kindergarten this fall. The other kids probably rock out to Coldplay and Zeppelin.

Bird and Deal are in desperate need of better musical company. An intervention even. I have clearly done them a disservice in the musical taste department. For the record, they also love Barry White (But what's not to like?!), Neil Diamond (think Sweet Caroline sung LOUDLY by two preschoolers), and Magical Mister Mistoffelees (I even took Bird to see Cats!). Other moms are ordaining their kids into the world of shows and concerts by taking them to Rain or James Taylor. Nope, not me.

If I'm not careful, my boys are going to have my same guilty pleasures on their iPod equivalents that will probably be microchips of music implanted in their brains one day. Trust me, my taste in music is impossibly bad. Not to be emulated. And so here goes, but a small sampling of my list of really, really, BBBBBAAAAAADDDD songs that I know all the words to and secretly LOVE:

Summer Nights - Olivia Newton John (Find me one person out there who doesn't love Grease!)
Don't Stop Believin' - Journey
Too Much Time on My Hands - Styx
Rock Me Gently - Andy Kim
Let the Music Play - Shannon
Rhinestone Cowboy - Glen Campbell (Just like bloggers...getting cards and letters[and comments] from people they don't even know)
Top of the World - the Carpenters (Karen rocked!)
Mandy - Barry Manilow
Knock Three Times - Tony Orlando (with or without Dawn?)
Unbelievable - E.M.F. (I also love me some E.L.O.)
Heaven is a Place on Earth - Belinda Carlisle
Don't Cha - Pussycat Dolls
Paradise by the Dashboard Light - Meatloaf (Mac Daddy *abhors* this song. It's a wonder I married him.)
Summertime and Gettin' Jiggy Wit It - Will Smith (He's on my *list.*)
Girlfriend in a Coma - The Smiths
Waitress in the Sky - The Replacements (Mac Daddy and I still sing this whilst chuckling on every single flight we take. Some jokes don't get old.)
Surrender - Cheap Trick (SO GOOD LIVE in Memorex!)
Urgent - Foreigner (Will always remind me of Chad Londeree, who gave me Foreigner 4 for my 13th birthday.)


I really need my brother or Tony to come intervene.

And don't go thinking I'm all uncool and dorky. I can hear your snarkiness right now. Snort snort...."That Dirt & Noise chick is so not hip. My dead great aunt is so much cooler." Perhaps the cast of Young at Heart is cooler than I am. Yeah, I'm tragically unhip. Cheesy also comes to mind. So what? Sure, I might be stuck in the 60s, 70s, 80s, but not today, but you won't recognize a damn thing on Tony's mix tape either.

So what's the verdict? Can the damage to Bird and Deal be undone?

What's on your iPod that you're willing to fess up to?
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8 comments:

The Over-Thinker said...

I'm pretty sure the damage is permanent :) But thinking of 2 little guys singing "Sweet Caroline" at the top of their lungs is easily one of the sweetest things I've heard. I'd babysit!

P.S. You should try to record them singing it!

Anonymous said...

Where's the Jimmy Buffet???

Anonymous said...

Oh the songs I have on mine! Although, my boys are more into Monster Rock, courtesy of their Dad!

Let's see; I have:
Duran Duran all of the 80's songs, not the new stuff; Alan Parson's Project, Kool and the Gang, Culture Club, Barry White, Commodores; Madonna - when she wore pointy bras, Eagles, Elton John, Eric Clapton, Fine Young Cannibals, Tom Jones, etc.

So no need to worry - my oldest got a CD from his teacher that has some super cool oldies on it! There are others out there who think like you do!

The Cube Monkey said...

I just bought a zune a few months back and the array of music is astounding. It shocks and awes alot of people.
Paul Pott (tenor opera) to
Ronnie Milsap to
Metallica to
Mussorgsky to
Evanescence to
Zeppelin.
If I had some blue grass, I'd put that on there too. hahaha

Mayberry said...

OMG Top of the World -- LOVE.

Anon ... I will cop to a little Jimmy. And Hooters.

Did I just say that in public?

Anonymous said...

The Hooters! I must download some now! Buffett is a given, no?

So Over Thinker, when will you be available to fly here to babysit?

Anonymous said...

You know my list and the tunes I blushingly admit to dancing in my living room to! ;) But let me be clear about one thing: there is no shame - NO SHAME - in rocking out to a little Karen Carpenter. "Close to you" is the song I sang to my oldest son after he was born and in the NICU (sniff sniff) and then who can forget the Tommy Boy scene where they are singing/crying along to "Superstar"... "doncha remember you told me you loved me babeeeee, baby baby baby baby ooohhhh babeeee". Ok, ok... enough outa me. :)

Anonymous said...

Oooooh! Journey! Last night I had the craziest dream about Steve Perry -- serious blog material.

And my MP's not afraid to get down in the middle of ... wherever, either. It's a beautiful thing. :)